Warning!

The Dangers of Dating

Whenever I think of "love", I just always imagine the sweet and romantic notions that come with it. Rarely do I think about it realistically, but then I'll remember all the pain and torment that's also part of the package.

Without further ado, a list:

Dressing to Impress

...Can be pretty hazardous. You want to dazzle your date and show yourself off at your very best, but to what extent? High waisted skirts to accentuate a tiny waist.... High heels to elongate your legs... 

But the anxiety and sickness that comes with it?

Think carefully-  especially when one is not used to walking in high heels. 

Social Media

Staring at your phone/laptop for a message and then finally! When you do receive a message, the palpitations and the rush of joy, followed by the emotions of dread as you try to pick your brains to come up with an awesome, witty reply... (which isn't that hard for me). 

And that's just from one txt. 

... Pathetic much?

Also, beware of Facebook stalking. 

Input/Output

Are you both putting effort into it? They say that "easy come, easy go" so, do you both want it to work or are you just going to "go with the flow"? 

Confidentiality 

Who do you tell about this new "relationship"? Is it time to change your Facebook status? To bring them home to meet the parents? Introduce to friends?

Or just keep them in the dark?

Definition

Too many titles nowadays to choose from- 

Cross out if not applicable:

[Boyfriend/Girlfriend/Love Of My Life/Friends With Benefits/Rebound/Crush/Booty Call/Friend zone]

Risk Analysis

You're inviting somebody into your life, leaving your heart unguarded and exposed... Question is, are they worth it?

But even after all the dangers, I still think that love is definitely a reward. I'm looking forward to it-  bypassing the perils just to bask in the safety of love.

Love,

How To...

Deal with Cheese-y One Liners

"Do you have a map? 'Cause I'm getting lost in your eyes." 

"Excuse me, but I think I dropped something... My JAW."

"Well, here I am. What were your other two wishes?"

...

What are they thinking? Is it meant to impress you? Do you laugh it off? ...Or scoff? 

Fear not, I have the perfect tactics. 

Method One: Cheese vs Cheese

Like they say, fight fire with fire. Same goes for cheese... Kinda.

Line: "Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?"

- "Yes it did, but I'd fall again if it meant meeting you".

Method Two: Cheese vs Sleaze

Let's just get straight to the point, you know what they're getting at.

Line: "Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?"

- "So, so  much. Will you massage me?" *indicate to chosen place(s)* [use with caution]. 

Method Three: Cheese vs Freeze

Put an end to it. 

Line: "Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?"

- "I'm in Hell, aren't I?"

All joking aside, look for the deeper meaning behind the [deeply unoriginal] lines. They're just trying to get to know you, be flattered! And play nice! 

Love,

Playing Games [with affairs of the heart].

Whether someone is doing it consciously, or subconsciously, I hate it. 

Y'all know what I'm talking about here, I bet we've all played games like:

'The Waiting Game', 'The Three Day Rule' and 'The Pursuit of Jealousy©' [*strongly recommended for two-players only*.]

I don't know whether it's just me over-thinking and analysing every little move, maybe they're not playing games at all and it's in my head. But I personally just prefer to be direct about my intentions, no messing around (I've actually been told that I have no subtlety). 

Although I can understand why we may resort to them, for whatever reasons: not wanting to look desperate and trying to appear cool(er) (definitely in my case). I guess the greatest risk is that someone could get hurt, hence all the motives. You may be secretly hoping that they fail the first round, to save your own feelings, but yet get disappointed if they do...

So, in the love game, when the stakes are high and your heart is on the line, will you fold, or go all in?

Love,